That was one of our many talks this morning in Pusat Sumber Belajar YAM. My supervisor said that it is a good topic to be an article. Well, why not? Maybe it can be other people’ way of thinking too nowadays. Who knows?

What is it actually? Pendidikan saling menyalahkan? Well, it all started when we talked about our students’ behavior. It seems that even we have tried very hard to lead them and teach them to be good, there  are always some students who try to ignore good deeds. Instead they also try hard to disobey the rules at school.

Who are to be responsible? Maybe an academic counselor will say “hey, I am just the academic counselor. I am responsible for their academic assessment. We just motivate them to study hard, work hard to gain the minimum criteria of each lesson. Even if they cannot reach the minimum standard, it does not mean it is my fault. May be she/he doesn’t work harder. Just ask the religion teachers for their behavior”. When we point to the Religion teachers perhaps they will say “hello, we already teach them good deeds, every single day. We ask them to pray, tell them to be good. What else do you expect from us? Maybe their parents do not teach them at home” And then the parents have this argument “What? You blame us? We pay much for this school to teach our kids to be good? yes, maybe we don’t have much time to teach them at home. That’s why we need you teachers here to help us.”

And I just can say STOP! It won’t lead us anywhere. Blaming each other for the sake of our kids’ behavior is like leading us nowhere. We have to sit together. This is not about someone’s fault. This is about how to find the solution. Well, I myself experience how hard it is to teach good deed to my own kid. Not only every day, but every single second if I can, I will try to teach him good. I even tell my problem in handling my kid to his principal at school to find the solution. And what did he say?

“Ibu, siapakah kita? Siapakah anak kita? Apakah dia hanya milik kita? Tidak. Dia adalah milik Sang Maha Pencipta. Ketika kita telah berusaha maksimal untuk mendidik putra-putri kita, maka itu adalah ikhtiar kita. Allah melihat apa yang kita lakukan. Tapi, tetap saja, semua hidayah datangnya dari Sang Khalik. Tidak bisa kita melampaui hak Dia sebagai pemilik diri kita dan putra-putri kita untuk mengubah sendiri. Kita ikhtiar, kita meminta dalam doa, kita pasrahkan pada Sang Khalik. Maka tidak akan ada lagi rasa marah, kecewa, menyesali diri yang tak sanggup mengubah anak kita menjadi anak yang sempurna.”

I think what he said makes sense. One thing that we should keep in mind is that our belief that every child is innocent. What they experience now is the process of learning for his life in the future. When we and the society see them do something wrong, they will understand it, may be not right away, may be later, or need more time than other children.  If we can keep this belief, I am sure that we could respond our kids’ mistakes in more positive ways.